Emotional Evolution

Emotional Journey

My Emotional Journey

Emotional Evolution: I believe the ‘Human Race’ has experienced ‘Emotional Evolution’ as a ‘whole’ on a global level but also on a more separate continental, national, cultural, tribal and partnership and individual level and more. Each can experience different types of progression or degression, stagnation, progression, degression and so on where emotions are concerned. The emotional journey will always be continuous with many different episodes.

My own emotional journey has experienced progression, degression, stagnation, progression and degression again and again at all levels, many times over. It is forever evolving into different states but the older I get, and the more experienced at dealing with my emotions, my emotional state has evolved and works more on a level plateau.

Evolution of Beliefs. I have always held belief in the paranormal, alien existence, life on other planets and capabilities of the mind that break boundaries of current understanding and so on. This belief was with me before my diagnosis and played its part in my diagnosis of schizophrenia.

Unfortunately for me, when I first opened up to a psychiatrist, I naively assumed they would talk with me openly about my beliefs. I did not realize I was being judged as delusional. For some years after my diagnosis, I concluded my beliefs were part of my experience with mental illness, but now, later in life, after breaking away from psychiatry, I fully believe in so many things again.

When first diagnosed, I spoke with my psychiatrist about psychic experiences, my belief in Earth like planets that would be home to alien life. I believed it was possible there are people who have alien encounters; I spoke about telepathy and life after death and much more. I can recall my psychiatrist response and telling me this was all ‘poppycock!’

November 15th 2013: I have just read an article stating Quantum Physics proves there is life after death! Stating death is an illusion!

Now in 2013, there is clear evidence Earth like planets exist and it has been estimated there are millions of Earth like planets and more and more scientists are saying it is very likely other life exists.  

I spoke to my psychiatrist about my father and his psychic beliefs, and my grandfather and how he tried to promote the powers of the mind (see film) assuming the psychiatrist would be interested and offer me further knowledge about the minds capabilities.

In my psychiatric notes it has been stated, male side of family are schizophrenic.

What I would call ‘liberation of thought’ can often be looked upon as delusional, those who think me as 'delusional' I often look upon as 'surpressed!’

Schizophrenia and Quantum Physics: It is my belief that some people with a diagnosis of schizophrenia would be very natural quantum physicists. We are in ‘pursuit of reality’ and it seems very natural for some, who share my diagnosis, to think and act outside the box. Many have what is perceived as strange beliefs and strange experiences. When I first watched the documentary film ‘Down the Rabbit Hole’ I naturally knew what was trying to be expressed and I believe, I have a natural basic understanding of the ‘quest’ relating to Quantum Physics. I believe I can thank my so called ‘schizophrenic mind’ for this!  

Conclusion: My travel to the Himalayas has helped me in so many ways. Culture here in the UK does not usually accept my beliefs and experiences. We are very scientific based and we have a very ‘if not discovered’ it does not exist approach. When trekking with Buddhist Sherpa’s in Nepal, I often spoke with them about Buddhism and 'life and the universe' and I found myself talking with people who shared my own beliefs. Life after death, being at one with nature and the universe, other life forms and so on. ‘It is best to have an open mind, as anything is possible’ was the often response. It was refreshing, and made me realize I should have the strength to believe in what I believe, no matter if the world of psychiatry thought it all poppycock! I concluded psychiatry are very wrong in their own beliefs, and I must stand true to myself, as there are plenty of others who share my mind! 

After diagnosis, I went through a stage of disbelieving myself, thinking my mind was warped and ill, that was a view I feel was forced upon me by psychiatry. Nowadays I find my mind intriguing. My thoughts and experiences should not always be looked upon as something of 'harm' I would not change my imagination, my so called delusions. Often my reality does not suit the reality accepted by the majority of society, and sometimes it has taken away the ability to function, as a so called ‘normal member’ of society. So my experiences and beliefs, according to some can be very disabling. That is true. But, my experiences were and still are, very often liberating!

Having a bit more understanding of the quest of quantum physics and a bit more understanding of Buddhism, has helped greatly! My beliefs have evolved from believing what I believe, to losing that belief, believing once again but with more structure and with a more grounded approach!